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Resolutions and Doughnuts

Making  New Years resolutions are a part of the change in the year for many. It is often the case that people make resolutions for self improvement, losing weight seems to be the most common resolution,  or maybe it is to eat healthier or excercise more. It struck me today as I was sitting down to write this article that much of what we resolve has do has to do with self. I suppose that when it comes to making resolutions the one thing that we should have some control over is ourself. Well what about other types of resolutions that may be moving away from self just a little? What about resolving to spend more time being a better listener?  This particular resolution may be one that revolves around our relationships and how we function within them.

Too many times we live life becomming self absorbed, self obsessed and fail to make the connections in life that are right in front of us. Often I hear my children talking away to me but sometimes fail to really listen to them. Yes my youngest two tend to talk incessantly and I tend to tune them out at times but maybe I should resolve to actually try to listen more often, maybe I should resolve to communicate better on a one on one basis, invite that friend out to coffee to just talk, spend time with just one of my parents at a time to listen to them and hear them. What is more important in life than the relationships we have?

If relationships are so important then why do we take them for granted and focus on things further down the scale of importance like weight loss when it comes to New Years resolutions. As an Audiologist I get to think about communication and how to improve it on a daily basis so perhaps this is a topic that is at the forefront of my conciousness for that reason. At Christmas time I wrote an article about taking the time to consider how best to communicate with that hearing impaired loved one during the holidays, perhaps this is also a valid consideration in every day. Life is so fast paced and hurried that we forget to slow it down from time to time and have that slow fulfilling conversation with that friend, co-worker, family member or aquaintance, to truly listen allowing that person to feel listened to and heard.

It takes some degree of skill and awareness to be able to have a converation with someone and verify that your message is getting across while also affirming that their message has been understood and feeling good about it. We talk about relationships and communication but these just become buzz words when we fail to intentionally make them an important part of our every day life. So maybe we can make these types of resolutions and lose weight by just skipping the doughnut at the coffee shop while having that conversation.