To Soar Above The Clouds

Dealing with death is really hard for me. I don’t like going to funerals at all primarily because they are so emotional for me. Over the years I have had so many patients pass away and on my own I mourn the loss. I am happy to sit with their family in office and talk, share and grieve yet I have a hard time getting myself to go to funerals. Recently I had a patient pass away unexpectedly, this was someone that I have known in excess of 15 years. I was so saddened by his death and felt it deeply. After a few days this gentleman’s wife came by the office to talk and to donate his hearing aids. We spent time talking about their life together and the special relationship they shared. This lovely lady eventually asked if I would come to the memorial service that was to take place in a few weeks. I said I would come. As I said I do have a very hard time with these types of events but I said I would be there and knew that I would go. This last Saturday I put on my best suit and headed out to the funeral home.

It is amazing what a small community we live in and the way out lives cross. At this memorial service I ran into patients, friends and acquaintances that I had no idea were connected to these folks. The celebration of life was full of stories that amazed me moved me and yes, made me cry. You see this man was stricken with polio at the age of 9 and was hospitalized for three years returning to his family at the age of 12. I heard stories of the fierce determination that he possessed to overcome and be a part of society without the boundaries of inhibition that polio had rendered in his life. I heard a beautiful love story set around his love for sailing where he met the love of his life, his beautiful. I heard of their special life in a cottage community swimming and sailing and enjoying the company of friends and family, I heard about their travels to Brazil or the West Coast of Canada. All through this story I continued to hear about the determination that persisted in this man that helped him overcome and adapt to life’s challenges and the further limitations in mobility that afflicted him. It should be no surprise to me that when he saw me in the context of seeking help with his hearing loss that he approached this disability with a will to find success and did.

One of the most beautiful parts of the service was when his wife spoke and shared pictures of their life. Towards the end of the talk she shared with us his love for airplanes and how he loved to fly. At one point in her story she shared with us a story, a special experience. Even though this man was wheelchair bound he wanted so badly to fly an airplane and eventually found his way into a glider with another pilot.  In order to get him into the plane they had to remove much of the safety equipment that would be of little use to him anyway. This lovely lady shared the story of his time flying and how the pilot let him fly and even extended their time significantly given the sheer joy that this man felt gliding silently through the clouds. When listening to this story many of us were brought to tears because as his wife shared this was a time in this mans life where he felt like he was not limited where he felt free. As she concluded with this story we could all infer our own belief system and how we viewed death with this visual in our minds. In the end I was lifted up by having attended this celebration of life being blessed by the experience.

While many have limitations either of mobility, or hearing or visual acuity etc. it is an important lesson in life to take on that challenge and find ways to live you r life to the fullest and in the way you choose. This very specific message is one that we as a company have been communicating this year through our marketing campaign. The message is to life your life in the way you choose being empowered to control what you can and in our case this is about hearing loss and communication. In the end I was honored and blessed to have experienced this celebration of life, as it was another learning experience for me.  Determination, stubbornness, a will to succeed can be such a valuable characteristic in life.

Selective Spousal Hearing Loss

Why is it so hard to hear your spouse  (insert smile)? Is this really an intentional inefficiency or is there more to it? I mean is "selective hearing"a real thing? I can't tell you how many of my patients come in because their significant other is telling them that they need to get their hearing checked. While often there is validity to the concern and hearing loss is definitely a part of what is going on there are other possibilities as well.

Certainly when one encounters hearing difficulty they themselves are often the last to know as they base normal upon themselves and their experience. Many times it is ones significant other that can see how hard it is for their partner to hear and is able to point it out. When you have known someone for a very long time it may be more obvious to you than another that they are not functioning the same way that they once did. In some cases it can be that split second of pause while filling in the parts one didn't quite catch or that look of confusion that quickly passes and is covered up with a smile or a nod or some other compensatory mechanism. Perhaps the domination of the conversation is what is witnessed as it is too difficult to follow. Whatever the difficulty may be it is common that those suffering are the last to know or accept the reality .
Now for another possibility. So many of the people that come in to see me because their significant other thinks they have a hearing problem have no hearing problem at all. The reality is that when you are comfortable with another you tend to do things in communication that may be very inefficient. In our own homes we try to have conversations from one room to the next or while on a different floor or with the television on or at the kitchen sink with the water running. The point is we communicate in ways that we never would with someone that was visiting our home. When we have company in our homes we tend to be in the same room conversing while atleast facing each other without the television or a lot of other background noise present, we tend to introduce our subject and converse in a manner where there is listening taking place as well as leading in conversation. In this context that individual that might be considered to have hearing loss may have little to no difficulty at all simply because of the efforts made to communicate well.
The responsibility for good communication is a two way street where all parties involved in communication have a responsibility. If you really want your husband or wife, family member friend or significant other to hear something and understand, then take the time to optimize your approach in communicating by limiting the background noise, by physical proximity, using your eyes, introducing your subject and a variety of other good communication habits. 

How Hearing Loss Is Good for The Health Of Wild Turkeys

 The motivation to do something about ones hearing can be different for everyone. One of my patients told me a funny story regarding his moment of realization that I thought I would share.

This particular man is an avid hunter enjoying all kinds of hunting. On this particular occasion I believe he was bow hunting. One of the things he really likes about hunting is being out I the woods by himself enjoying nature. This particular year he was in his regular tree stand and noticed that the woods seemed devoid of any kind of animal life, no squirrels running around, no birds in the tree, and certainly no turkeys to shoot.

When this man got home his wife and daughter both finally asked him what the loud beeping sound was that seemed to be following him around. Apparently what had happened was that his watch alarm had gone off emitting a high pitched beeping that he was unable to hear but that all the woodland creatures heard very well and avoided leaving hi sitting in his tree stand with no company.

When he told me this story and told me it was the final straw in recognizing that he may have a hearing problem he had me laughing out loud especially since he was telling it a s a humorous story. The happy ending to the story is that he got his hearing aids and wild turkeys are no longer safe